On making mistakes

On making mistakes

Sometimes, despite our best intentions, mistakes happen. Some sneak up on us, some pop right out in our faces and still others are big enough that the proverbial shit hits the fan.

But if there’s anything I’ve learned since becoming self-employed, it’s that it’s not the mistake that matters.

It’s how you handle it.

If you rant and rave and scream and cry, not only will you not get anywhere, but everyone around you will either get pissed off at you and scream back or they’ll just simply leave. The problem then becomes you have nobody around to help you pick up the pieces and get back on track. You have nobody who believes in your message or your product.

The right way to handle mistakes

Own it. Acknowledge it. Apologize if necessary. But never blame anyone else. I don’t care if you think it truly is someone else’s fault – never lay blame. It’ll come back to bite you in the ass. And – it will be the ONE thing everybody remembers. You don’t want that. It would be the downfall of your business.

Just accept responsibility. And then get on with fixing it if at all possible.

In addition to owning it and accepting responsibility, your next step is to speak the truth – no sugar-coating, no beating around the bush, no blaming – just say it as plain and simple as possible.

And never make excuses!

Excuses are just laying blame elsewhere. Excuses are the weak way out. They have no place in your business. Or your personal life, for that matter.

I remember several years ago when I first started doing design work as a side job to my regular full-time employment, I had a customer who wanted a program, sorta like what you get when you go the circus or something. Glossy, filled with photos and info and cool trivia stuff.

At the time, I worked in a print shop and got a quote from the owner for printing this program. I was going to do everything else – design, layout, paste-up, etc – and the shop was going to do the actual printing. Then I would handle the folding and binding of the program.

Well, I got it all ready for press and it was run – full color cover and black and white interior. It looked good.

But due to increasing the number of programs as well as paper changes and a few other miscellaneous details, my boss ended up charging me a few hundred more than the original quote. It ended up eating my profit margin so I had to go tell my customer that there was a price increase.

So, I called her and asked for a face-to-face meeting. When we met later that week, I simply told her that due to the paper changes and the increased number of programs, it was going to add to the cost.

She was a little irritated at first, but in the end she thanked me for just telling her the truth, straight up and to the point, and asking for an increase in price. She gladly paid it and even spread the word about my business to other small business owners. At the time, it was one of the best testimonials I’d ever gotten.

As I said earlier, accepting responsibility for mistakes and then fixing them if at all possible is the right way to handle problems. No blame. No beating around the bush. Just straight and to the point without excuses.

It might not always come out exactly like you want, you may even still lose the customer in the end. But you’ll never have to beat yourself up for how you handled it. You’ll never have to regret making an ass of yourself or worse. No matter what happens with the customer, you can hold your head high knowing you acted with integrity. Which, of course, is Rule 1.

And speaking of Rules . . .

I’m right on track with the eBook (Only Dead Fish Go With the Flow) I’m releasing this Friday to my newsletter subscribers. It’s out right now in the hands of a couple of good friends who are going over it checking for errors or inconsistencies. Woo-hoo! I can’t wait to share it with you!

Please make sure you’re signed up for the newsletter so you’ll get a copy.

I’ll talk to you soon!

Until next time . . . keep blazin’!

Dream something worthy

Dream something worthy

You know what? There is no magic step-by-step plan to make your dreams a reality.

Nope.

And anybody who tells you there is, is flat-out lying to you.

The truth is, everybody’s path is different. No two paths are the same. And if you’re following someone else’s path, let me ask you a question – who are you?

Are you them? Or you, YOU?

Because

“Following another’s path leads to who THEY are, not to who YOU are.” ~ Harry Palmer

Understand I am not saying you can’t observe what others have done. I am not saying you can’t have success by following a similar plan to someone else. But what you need to realize is that you can’t do every little thing the same way they do. You risk losing yourself and you risk jeopardizing your own mission, your own dream. Destiny, if you will.

And then what? Are you going to be pissed off at them because THEIR plan didn’t work for YOU? That’s fucking absurd! Take a look at MLM and you’ll see what I mean. Here you have a group of people who all repeat a process that someone else designed, that maybe brought that original person great success. But even though the newbies follow everything to a T, they fail.

Why?

Is the system flawed? Probably not. But I’d be willing to bet that the system doesn’t work for every single person who tries it, no matter how hard they try. Simply because what’s right for one person, isn’t always right for another.

Same goes with everything I write on this blog.

Some people will benefit greatly from it and do well with implementing my philosophy. Others won’t. It doesn’t mean my ideas are wrong or don’t work – it just means they’re not for everyone.

And that’s why it’s so important to follow your own dream. Find your own way.

Blaze a trail where there is no path.

That’s why I am working hard to inspire others to dream something worthy. Do epic shit.

What you have to offer the world matters. Let your light shine.

Take a bold step forward and do just one thing today to move you closer. One step at a time. Whatever that one step is. Only you know for sure.

Until next time . . . keep blazin’!

Health challenge – week 1

Health challenge – week 1

Things have gotten off to a good start so far! I’m quite pleased with how it’s going.

Friday marked the first week of my 100% vegan diet and I’m happy to say I feel really good. I have not been hungry even once after a meal. I’ve also not had any headaches, bloated feelings or any stomach upset of any kind. Which is very nice.

Why vegan and not simply vegetarian?

Well, a couple reasons, actually. The first being that I’m allergic to dairy and eggs and even though I ate them or things that contained them (like bread, for example) sometimes, my allergies to them actually seem to be getting worse as I get older. I figured that I’d simply eliminate them and see if that really helps my allergies. So far, I haven’t noticed any difference in the allergy department yet but I do seem a little less stuffy in the mornings. I’m not sure if that’s a result of the vegan food or just that the weather has finally been nice and dry. ;-)

The second reason is the  plan I am following advocates the elimination of all dairy, eggs and oils.

For me, this way of eating is not a diet – I generally understand the term diet to mean a temporary shift in eating habits. That’s not what I am doing. This is going to be a lifelong change.

Initially, I was just going to try it for 2 weeks and then maybe continue if I felt well. But in the past week, I’ve done a lot of research and really paid attention to how my body is feeling. For me, it just really makes sense to make it a lifelong change for health and personal reasons at this point.

One thing that brought about this change of mind in the past week is, I’ve gone from my jeans being a perfect fit to being able to pull them off and on without unzipping or unbuttoning them. I think that says it all right there. Plus, Friday morning, I was wearing my sweatpants and when I put my phone in my pocket, it was heavy enough to make my sweats fall down! LOL ;-) That was pretty funny! Again, prior to this week, my sweats were the perfect size for me.

I guess I’ll be going clothes shopping for smaller sizes very soon! That I can handle. :)

I have no idea how much weight I’ve lost since I don’t have a scale. But I think it’s safe to say I probably have lost a pound or two. That’s good enough for me!

The second factor in deciding to continue it for the foreseeable future is that I’ve already been partially vegan for about 4-5 years so I figured what’s the point of only doing 2 weeks? I already know that even at a partially vegan diet, I felt better than I had for a long time. What was stopping me from simply embracing something I know without a doubt is the right thing for me? And the answer is – nothing!

Anyway, it’s going well. I feel well. And that’s what matters most to me.

Next time I’ll share a few recipes with you.

And I’d love to hear how you’ve been doing if you’re following my health challenge, too.

Until then . . . keep blazin’!

 

It’s all about connecting

It’s all about connecting

During my years in real estate, my mentor used to say often that no matter what kind of problem you were dealing with, it was all about connection. Since then, I’ve found this to be true in practically every endeavor. And I find it especially true as an entrepreneur.

Every day, you’re given a choice of how to act with every person you encounter. But these days it seems like truly great customer service is the farthest thing from the business mind. I find this rather disturbing. Because instead of acting on faith and genuine care, it seems people often react to the situation.

Well, you can’t react to a situation and come out unscathed. It’s just not possible.

If you want that good experience from your customers, you have to give that good experience to them.

First.

You have to make a connection with them. And sometimes you have mere seconds to do that.

Customer service – true, genuine, customer care – is on the decline. All these huge corporations forget that. They’ve gotten so big, they’re just a machine, churning out their product or service. They’ve forgotten that connection to their customers. It’s a sad thing to see.

But the good news for YOU as an entrepreneur is that you’re not a big machine. And you can change that. You can treat your business like a personal interaction with each customer. You can show them value in you not just in whatever you’re offering.

I’ll tell you what – I would rather deal with a human than a big corporate game any day of the week.

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

Make a connection with your people and you’ll have them seeking you out time and again.

Until next time . . . keep blazin’!

The dirty bits

The dirty bits

 

And the time came when the risk to remain tightly closed in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~ANAIS NIN

 

IMG 1987

 

It’s those very things that fracture us that become like glue to deliver us whole and newly made. Let what breaks you reveal the blessing that puts you back together.

A couple of days ago, a friend asked me a question which prompted me to rewrite this post and reschedule others I had written. She asked me if I had forgiven myself for carrying on, for still being here. And although the question was geared to a different conversation, it rammed itself into the dark recesses of my mind and punched this one in the face.

Hard.

Because the truth of the matter – the deep, dark unrevealed truth that lurks within – is for the past 18 months since this incident, I’ve been hiding from my emotions. Only feeling things on the surface so I didn’t have to deal with the pain.

I have been broken and fragile and not quite whole.And too afraid to be vulnerable enough to feel it.

But I realized something today – I have to allow myself that vulnerability, that openness. Because that’s where growth sprouts. That’s where healing begins. Where joy is found despite the pain. Where peace is found despite the anguish.

Even though I fundamentally – intellectually, knew this was true – that dealing with the pain was the only way through the pain as I wrote just a few weeks ago in moving on – it’s still taken the weeks since to fully realize it and make the emotional connection. To get to that complete breaking point.

So, here I am today and writing this to you, sharing my humanness with you, because I want you to know that whatever you’re going through in your own life, you’re not alone. There are people out here – even people like me who seem to have it all together – who know, who understand, who care. There are people who have been there.

When you cut through all the bullshit you realize

Living and breathing and nurturing your purpose is not easy.

And anybody who tells you it is, is a big, fat liar.

But it’s hella rewarding. And in the end, it’s totally worth it.

When life kicks your ass . . . scream back! And stand up for yourself.

Listen, here’s the thing – there is no magic bullet. No perfect answer. When you stop looking OUTSIDE for what is already INSIDE YOU, then and only then will you feel the joy and the bliss and the happiness in spite of everything else. And I’m not saying your fears will go away – far from it – but you can push through them knowing that you’re right where you need to be right now.

You can know that you’re going to be ok. That you’re not taking a back seat to life anymore. You will know that you are in the driver’s seat and the bus is headed where ever YOU want to go.

That’s FREEDOM, friends.

And then, you can look that fear in the face and tell it shut the hell up. ;-)

As always, keep blazin’!

PS – The eBook I’ll be releasing on September 2 is shaping up very nicely! I’ve spent the past few days working very hard on it. I really think you’re going to like it and I can’t wait to share it with you! But you have to be a newsletter subscriber to do so. If you haven’t subscribed yet, you can do so here —-> Badass Trailblazer Newsletter

The health challenge

The health challenge

Part of living a Badass Trailblazing life is taking care of your health.

You can’t kick ass in the other areas of your life if you’re sick and unhealthy physically.

When I was younger, I was extremely healthy. As I got older, though, I began having some issues that derailed my healthy lifestyle. One of those issues – the major player, in fact – was that I seriously injured myself at work. I have 2 very damaged discs in my lower back and 2 others that are moderately damaged. It causes some extreme nerve problems in my legs, often making my legs and feet totally numb. And I have A LOT of muscle spasms which I do take medication for. I also take medication for high blood pressure (which for me is due to heredity, unfortunately).

About a year ago, my neurologist was planning to do surgery because my back problem has continued to get worse and worse. I originally hurt my back in the fall of 1997 and although I’ve had times where things weren’t too bad, for the last 8 years, things have gotten increasingly worse year by year. Unfortunately, though because of where the worst of my damage is located, it’s very risky to do surgery.

Anyway, long story short – because I am physically unable to do anything more than light exercise, I’ve gained weight. Weight gain is also a side effect of the blood pressure medication I was taking. However, I convinced my doctor to change my prescription to a different one that seems to be better so far. I’ve actually been able to lose some weight in the past several months since changing.

Of course, there’s also the fact that I’ve had 4 kids. LOL That has contributed to the weight factor as well.

But my main point is that you have to take a proactive stance to your health.

Maintaining good health is essential to your self-esteem, your energy levels, your brain function and of course, your life over-all.

So, as part motivation for myself – and motivation for you too – I’m going to start documenting my health plan as part of this blog. Each week, I’ll post what I’ve been doing with regard to exercise, cooking and eating. I may share some recipes with you and some of my workout routines as well.

Are you up for the challenge?

Although my basic workout generally consists of hand weights and biking, you’d be surprised what you can really do for exercise when you have restrictions on what you can and can’t do like me. I have to be careful so I don’t damage my back further.

Right now, I alternate my workout – Monday, Wednesday and Friday are strength training. For that, I have a 10lb kettlebell that I do 15 minutes of kettlebell swings with, twice a day.

Then on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday I ride my bike for 10-15 miles. I’m hoping this fall if the weather cooperates to step this up to 20-30 miles a day.

I also do some stretches every day and I try to do jumping jacks or jumping rope as well. And a few times a week, I try to throw in some Qi Gong.

Four or five years ago, I read the book “Eat Right for Your Type” and found that as a Type A+, I would do well on a primarily vegetarian diet. Admittedly, I haven’t really followed through with that. ;-) I think I’ve allowed the excuse that it’s because the rest of my family aren’t big veggie eaters – they all prefer meat and such.

But you know, that’s just an excuse.

I gotta kick my own ass and get it in gear.

Two of my kids and my mom are Type O. According to the book, they DO do better on a high protein diet. So, that’s been my excuse. And I’m ready to get rid of it. Frankly, though, when it comes to stuff like food, I’m pretty lazy in that I don’t want to change my shopping list staples and my family’s favorite meals.

Now, I’m making this sound like we eat poorly. That’s very far from the truth. When I kept a food log for a week last year at my doctor’s request, he was very surprised at how healthy we actually do eat. I often cook from scratch and as we have many allergies in our household (my mom, oldest daughter and I are all allergic to dairy products. I’m also allergic to peanuts and my mom to shellfish and flax. Plus my mom and I are both allergic to eggs.)

Fortunately, all of the allergies we have to watch out for leaves very little room for us to eat poorly.

Anyway, here’s one of my favorite summer and warmish weather staples.

“Blended Salad”

Basically, all you do is throw the entire lot into a blender and mix the hell out of it!

  • A handful of 50/50 Spring Mix (pre-mixed, bagged salad)
  • A handful of Baby Spinach
  • 1-2 tablespoons ground Flax Seed
  • 2-3 cloves minced Garlic
  • 1 teaspoon Apple Cider Vinegar
  • Half of a medium sized Apple, seeded and cored
  • 1 tablespoon psyllium powder (can use a fiber supplement like Metamucil or something)
  • 10-12 ounces of water

Once it’s blended, pour it into a glass and enjoy. This will make one large glass or two 8-9oz glasses.

Three out of four of my kids will even drink it. ;-)

Sometimes I add other things like strawberries or pineapple. Or mango. Mango is REALLY tasty! I love mangos. Sometimes I add wheat germ or protein powder to it. Once in a while, I’ll use almond or hemp milk in place of the water.

Ok! I think that’s long enough for today! LOL Haven’t written anything this long in a while. ;-) I hope you enjoyed it. And I hope you’re ready to begin this challenge with me.

 

Announcing the Badass Trailblazer Newsletter!

Announcing the Badass Trailblazer Newsletter!

If you’ve been to the site in the past few days, you may have noticed a new widget in the sidebar that showed up late Tuesday. It’s a subscription widget for a brand new newsletter I’ll be putting out on Friday’s beginning one week from today on August 26.

Introducing: The Badass Trailblazer Newsletter

Now, the newsletter is not the same thing as subscribing to the blog posts in email. The newsletter contents will NOT be in the RSS feed or the email subscription or even posted on the blog at all. The only way to get the newsletter is by signing up for a subscription. It’s easy, painless and spam free. And as usual, your name and email will never be shared, rented, sold or given to anyone else.

Additionally, you may remember a few weeks ago when I posted about the upcoming eBook based on my 10 Rules. The only way you’ll be able to get that eBook for FREE is to sign up for the newsletter. Yes, it’s part of my diabolical plan to rule the world. ;-) LOL Just kidding, of course.

Seriously, though, it’s just part of my plan to help you lead a kick-ass life and do wicked good epic shit.

By the way, if you haven’t seen my new mission statement page and my new about page, go take a look at them. You’re going to see many changes around here as I push things into high gear. We are going to have a lot of fun, do great things and together, we’ll take our lives to the next level.

You’ll probably notice that I’ve changed things to be less formal around here. Frankly, I’m not a formal person – it always felt a little forced. In reality, I’m a very laid back, easy going and yet blunt person who likes to have fun. I hope you’ll come to see over the course of our time together on the blog, that I fully believe and live the 10 Rules every day.

So, anyway, go sign up for the newsletter! The first edition will arrive in your inbox next Friday August 26 and when the eBook is ready on September 2nd, you’ll get a copy of that.

 If you’re reading via RSS or otherwise can’t see the form below, you can sign up at this link —> Badass Newsletter Signup

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