Annie Anderson | Blog

Welcome back! Coffee's always on around here. Pull up your favorite chair and a grab a cup. Enjoy your visit today! And don't forget to stop back by again soon.

I apologize for not being around lately and for leaving this place void of new posts and things.

It’s not that I meant to leave you alone for so long, I’ve just been dealing with some personal issues that have taken up much of my time and mostly, my energy. The day to day things I’ve been preparing have left me with no energy for anything besides my family.

And while that has been good for me, it probably hasn’t been so great for you and I apologize to you for that.

Now, a few of you do know what’s been going on and I want thank you for standing by me and offering your support, your friendship and your time. It means more to me than you will ever know, more than I can ever express. And though these words seem inadequate, I sincerely thank you from the bottom of my heart.

For those of you who don’t know, I am going to spill the beans in just a few minutes but first, I want to say that this is likely the only time I’ll really speak about it on this blog. I don’t want this blog to become something it never was intended to be and also — I don’t like to focus on the ugly things in life. I much, much prefer to focus on the all good stuff and that’s what I try to do here, be positive.

So the big news is very personal and, as you know if you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, I rarely discuss truly personal things. I may tell you about my family or something we did together and such like that but I don’t think I’ve ever talked about something THIS personal before.

Please bear with me . . .

(. . . . . . . . taking a deep breath . . . . . . . .)

I’ve kicked my husband out of the house.

A few months ago, I began to notice things. At first, just small things. I had a niggling thought in the back of my mind but I didn’t pay attention to it. I just dismissed it . . . because, see, we’ve down this road once before. So I was hoping – hoping beyond all hope – that I was wrong.

But . . . I wasn’t. Unfortunately.

Not even in the least. It’s even more this time than it was last time. I knew I should have sent him packing back then. But he said he’d get help, he said it would never happen again. And I told him it would take a very, very long time to rebuild my trust – to regain – my trust.

And he blew it all. Again.

He began, from what I can tell, by chatting with other women online and responding to personal ads on various websites. He browsed dating websites and made contact with several women. He created profiles on dating sites where he said he was either single or divorced. He sent other women nude pictures of himself. He received nude pictures of some of them.

Now I have learned that he has actually met some of them in person. And not just for coffee . . .

Not only all of that, but he has stolen money from me, not paid bills he was supposed to pay and gotten involved in some scam that has gotten his PayPal account frozen. I also suspect it has caused him some issues with his bank account as well. Thank god we don’t have a joint account! But I do fear that because I’ve sent him electronic transfers from MY account, that somehow the scammers have my info anyway. As a result, I’m canceling my cards and closing my accounts.

Anyway, although the 2 older kids know, the 2 younger ones do not and I don’t plan to tell them until they specifically ask questions. Right now, they just think he’s “at school” since that’s the norm. Until recently, he had evening classes so they are used to him not being home for dinner and bedtime. Due to that, it’s made it’s pretty simple so far.

You know what breaks my heart the most, though?

I know, somewhere down deep inside, he really is a good guy. He can very sweet. He can be very attentive and for the most part, he’s a fairly decent father a good amount of the time. And it saddens me most that somewhere along the line, he has lost his way.

Even so, I just cannot tolerate this type of behavior. The good stuff, unfortunately, doesn’t make up for the bad stuff. Not like this. I mean, I can handle the little things. We all have our quirks and areas where we can improve. But when it comes to morals, I can’t compromise my own.

And that’s what this boils down to. I have to be true to myself. Because how I can be true to my family, my children, otherwise? How can I be true to those who need me most if I cannot be true to myself first?

That realization, to be true to myself, finally lead to my decision to ask him to leave. Probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my whole life.

Although it is hard and there will obstacles in the future as well, I am certain I’ve made the right choice.

For me, for now, that is enough.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and thank you for your understanding. I hope I’ll be able to post more again very soon. Until then . . . as always, my friends -

Be blessed,